Steve sent me both of these jokes, and they provided a GREAT laugh for me for the day so I hope you will all enjoy them as much as I did. The first is especially easy to associate with if you've recently had a toddler in your house!
Cup of tea for Daddy
One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me and my brother who is four years older than I am. I was maybe 1 and ahalf years old and had just recovered from an accident in which my arm had been broken among other injuries.
Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a get-well gift and it was one of my favorite toys. Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news and my brother was playing nearby in the living room when I brought Daddy a little cup of 'tea', which was just water. After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea, my Mom came home. My Dad made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the cutest thing!!' My Mom waited, and sure enough, here I come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy and she watches him drink it up, then says, 'Did it ever occur to you that the only place that baby can reach to get water is the toilet??'
And sure enough........!!!
Warning: Some of you are already aware that I am not fond of cats, so I find it easy to enjoy this joke. If, however, you love cats and are outraged on their behalf when someone pokes fun at them, you might want to skip this :)
Toilet Cleaning Instructions :
1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.
4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.
5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power-wash' and rinse'.
6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.
8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.
9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.
Sincerely, The Dog
6 comments:
OK, even though I love my cat, that was actually funny! And "Tea for Daddy" Hahahaha!
I LOVE the cat joke and of course the other one but that one was great!!!! I dislike cats a bunch. so this was purrr fect :)
Those were both really funny. Thanks for the laugh.
Those were both hilarious! Thanks for the laugh! I read both out loud to Jeff; he was practically gagging when I finished reading Tea for Daddy. So funny!
those were a great lift after last night! I personally love the second one (why do cats exist, anyway?) but that tea for daddy was pretty darn funny too!
I can't wait to read them to Josh, especially the "tea" one. I loved 'em both, what a great way to make a tummy hurt:)
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